Friday, May 4, 2012

Open letter to Chipotle Mexican Grill

When are you coming to Montreal? I hate to point out the obvious, but Toronto already has three Chipotle locations, and Montreal? Zip. Nada. Nothing. Most importantly, we love our food here in Montreal, nay, we embrace it with a passion bordering on obsession. Toronto? Let's just say I once sat beside a woman who ordered a non-fat non-caf latte and a bagel with low-fat cream cheese. As I sat sipping my full fat, bold, 100% fully caffeinated cup of joe (THE WAY GOD INTENDED COFFEE TO BE ENJOYED) she proceeded to cut the bagel in half, then used her fingernails like a miniature frontloader to scrape the soft doughy interior out of the bagel and on to her plate. She seemed to take it as a personal challenge to see how much dough she could gouge out while leaving the exterior intact. She paused every so often in her quest to remove bits of bagel guts from under her manicured claws, and didn't stop until that hapless bagel was fully eviscerated, a literal hollow shell of its former self. She then used a smidgen of low-fat cream cheese on the bagel crust and ate it as though it might bite her back. Here in Montreal? We drink half the night away with friends then stagger out looking for sustenance to get us home - poutine, smoked meat, souvlaki, or over to Fairmount or St.-Viateur to grab a bag of hot, hand-rolled bagels out of the wood-fired oven along with some smoked salmon and cream cheese. So come on, Chipotle. Do you not see how welcome you would be here in La Belle Province? Don't make me go to the U.S. or back to Toronto to get my fix. Give a girl a break. And a burrito with a side of guac.

9 comments:

Linda G. said...

Mmmm. I love Chipotle. Especially since our local on got its liquor license, and can not server margaritas. And beer. Yum!

Uh...sorry. I'm sure the Chipotle management will hear your pleas and respond soon. :)

A Novel Woman said...

I can't keep driving to Buffalo. I will, however, be in Scottsdale soon so I'll be able to tap that one.

Debby said...

I do have to say that those diet-y sorts...honestly...they're a bit freakish. Why did bulldozer woman even buy the bagel?

A Novel Woman said...

Well, to be fair to Bulldozer Talons, I do the reverse with a roast chicken. I'll pull off the crispy skin and eat it. But that makes sense. The gutted bagel? Senseless slaughter, to my way of thinking.

Super Earthling said...

Hmm, I've never been to a Chipolte Mexican Grill. Based on your post, I think I may be missing out!

Rachel said...

Hmmm. Y'all must really be starved for decent Mexican food if you get this excited about Chipotle. It's making me think that there are indeed compensations for putting up with the the heat, humidity, occasional hurricanes and not being able to grow peonies in Houston to have so many good Mexican food choices that Chipotle is way down on my list.

Liane said...

A Chipotle just opened near us Pam...I'd say about 1.2 miles from our house...close enough to go and get any time we feel like it, or any time we have visitors from Montreal say....just hinting!

Noah said...

I would kill for a Chipotle in Montreal. Mexican food here is terrible.

Sébastien Roy said...

Tout à fait!

Ils nous manquent `Québec aussi!!!