The Boy was unloading the tires from my car and "somehow" they fell out of the car because they hadn't been "stacked properly." Now our metal light post is severed it from its base and is teetering precariously over my car. And a snow storm is in the forecast.
So today, instead of my weekly manicure and foot massage, I will go forth in search of electricians and a new light post. Meanwhile, Middle Child is slaving away writing a book report on the cultural history of the penis for her anthropology class and reading bits aloud for my edification. While she found the book enlightening, she was critical of the lack of "visual support" in the book. She claimed to be referring to the lack of photos on the instruments of torture used in witch hunts, but I suggested she might want to clarify that bit.
And I was kidding about the manicure and massage. Never had either, probably never will, as all our money is going to replacing light standards and education so our kids can learn about the history of the penis.